WHEN THE COPS SAY NO, WE SAY YES

WHEN THE COPS SAY NO, WE SAY YES

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When The Cops Say No, We Say Yes is the world’s first speed solving detective agency. Join us as we attempt to solve real non-crime crimes submitted by YOU, our precious listeners.

Episodes drop every two weeks.

Season 3 Trailer

Awards / Almost Awards

Best Comedy

When The Cops Say No, We Say Yes

Gold Winner 2026

Best Episode - Comedy

Who Shat In My Dishwasher??

Nominee 2026

Indie Podcast Limited Run

The Case Of The Tiny Suit/Case

Honouree 2025

Moment of the Year

Who Shat On The Floor At My Wedding?

Bronze 2021

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WHEN THE COPS SAY NO, WE SAY YES

Season 3

An award winning podcast that attempts to solve real non-crime crimes and ridiculous mysteries submitted by YOU, our precious listeners.

An award winning* podcast involving a tiny suit, a sinister suitcase and three unqualified detectives.

THE CASE OF THE TINY SUIT/CASE

Season 2

*once we get one

WHO SHAT ON THE FLOOR AT MY WEDDING?

Season 1

An award winning* podcast involving two brides, one turd and one unqualified detective.

*bronze

It was the perfect day…

Until someone shat on the floor.
Karen Whitehouse and Helen McLaughlin got married on Saturday the 11th of August, 2018.
The mystery of the crime has been tormenting them ever since. They have to know who, out of their closest friends, family (or staff) were audacious enough to loosen their bowels… on the floor… on their special day.
Join the brides, Helen Mclaughlin and Karen Whitehouse, and the extremely under-qualified ‘Detective’ Lauren Kilby, as they interrogate wedding guests, hook bridesmaids up to polygraph machines and speak with top forensic experts in an attempt to crack the case.

Listen to the trailer

Follow the chaos

Undercover birdwatching + threat replication + a shared hotel room + a major organisational change = possibly our most unhinged episode yet? We’ll let you be the judge…

Bristol Bangers Part 3 is ready for your ears. But the question is,

It began with a pile of abandoned sausages. And it will end with us flinging a 20kg weighted bag in a park and then going undercover to a brunch.

Any questions?

Bristol Bangers Part 2 is out now.

WE DID IT! We won Best Comedy at the British Podcast Awards!!!

We’ve been working hard on this show for years. And so it means the world to see our efforts pay off. Especially for a small indie podcast where we do everything ourselves from edi

A pile of hundreds, possibly thousands, of raw pork sausages appeared overnight in the middle of a park in Bristol, UK.

Was it a crime against British sausage loving culture? A crime against vegans? Or a sausage heist gone horribly wrong? Bristol B

A sinister threat in fluff form or a twisted thank you note? Yet another case of reverse theft where the planted items get larger and larger in size… WHY? Jurassic Prank Bonus episode is out now. 🦖

1 phone call. 
1 last move. 
1 final shot at the truth.

The Dance Floor Dropper Finale is out now.

The perpetrator is just one phone call away…

Dance Floor Dropper Part 5 is out now. And the finale launches on 10th Sept🕺🪩💩✋🕵️🕵️

“Belly laugh after belly laugh”

“Laughing out loud in the street, I don’t even care that people are staring”

“Pure joy”

“Beyond ridiculous”